plaidknight

New month. Same everything else.

I managed to drop a blot of a ketchup/mustard mixture onto my keyboard and resorted to popping out the G key in order to clean it. Unfortunately, I somehow managed to screw up the H key in the process, so it doesn't quite... stick in right. It still functions and it shouldn't pop out for no particular reason, it just isn't resting in the... thing properly, so it tends to twist sideways. I suppose it's more of a minor annoyance than anything, but I'm pretty sure the key will fall out if I decide to shake my keyboard upside-down, which I do every now and then to free some of the more interesting things trapped in behind there. Charming, isn't it?

I need to pay some bills. Maybe try looking for another job. My hours look slightly better in two weeks, but they're still crappier than other people who have less availability than I do. I'm not surprised, of course, but it still tends to annoy a person. I know my boss hates me and I need to look elsewhere, I just fucking hate doing so. Ugh. Argh. Woe is me.

I think I'm tired of writing already. I was going to mention something about Dark Souls and only playing it at so-and-so's place and whatnot, but I'm not sure I really feel like it. I did have the random hankering to play it more the other day and I'm not sure that's entirely left me. That's okay. I could probably borrow it if I really wanted to. He still needs to free Suikoden III from the clutches of his deceased PS3 though. Hehe. Priorities. And whatnot. Funny funny.

Why haven't I been doing more creative writing?

Oh right. I suck.

I'm fighting the urge to eat something again since I apparently have something resembling heartburn or whatever the fuck it is going on, and I'm not even really hungry. The only reason I want to eat something is because it would briefly amuse me or make me happy or some fucking shit. You know, typical fat people nonsense. Frraaaaaaaaaaack.

My father called me yesterday around 8:30 at night and insisted that he needed my help to move something particularly heavy. He told me that he was already getting two other people to help him and I didn't really feel it was necessary for me to be there, but after hearing his fucking guilt trip bullshit, I went out there anyway. I ended up taking a very long and stupid detour on account of construction and a train and ended up getting lost briefly in a very random section of Winnipeg. After I finally made it to my father's house, I discovered that things were already pretty much done by the time I got there and I wasn't actually needed. Was I surprised? Fuck no. Was I annoyed? You fucking know I was. I left almost immediately because I didn't see much point in sticking around and it was fairly late by that time anyway. What a fucking waste of time...

I've been tooling around in King of Fighters 2002 lately trying to learn new things. Lots of basic things, really, but things that new to me anyway. I'm trying once again to teach someone else how to play the game, but I don't see this getting very far or having much progress. It could be because I'm a pessimist at heart, but I like to think of it more as being "realistic". Whatever. It's something to amuse myself with and I pretend like there's a chance in fucking hell that I'll actually have someone else to play fighting games with as a result. El oh fucking el. Golly gee willikers, you'd think I was bitter or something.

I need to write something. I don't fucking feel like it. I should look for another job. I don't fucking feel like it. I should beat DDS. I don't fucking feel like it. I should do something remotely productive. I don't FUCKING FEEL LIKE IT. There's not a goddamn fucking thing that I currently feel like doing and I'm fucking bored, annoyed, and feeling like I want to fucking punch something. Fuck...

Hah. It's funny and pathetic how I've considered letting someone see my journal and yet I keep writing stupid shit in it. Ha. Fucking. Ha.

I had an incredibly bizarre dream (or series of dreams) last night. None of it makes any sense, but at this point, I'm usually surprised if I can actually sort any of the details.

Batman. The Joker. Batman's cape was too long so he kept tripping on it. I don't know if that was actually supposed to be Batman or someone just dressed like him. There were also alien gangsters of various different species and one of them sounded like he was black, except he spoke some nonsense language. I don't remember if it was subtitled in my dream or not. I have a feeling that it was. Or maybe he actually did sound black and was speaking in ebonics or something. I don't remember. I think the Joker stole something from them and they weren't too pleased. Then there was something about some woman who was immortal, but not really because she had died but somehow managed to sustain her body because she had unfinished business? I don't know. She was like... 80 or 300 at the same time. I think there was something about someone teleporting around and doing... stuff. And.. fuck. Then there was something about being in space, something went wrong and I was briefly in zero gravity, something... something. Some red-headed Polish girl (or maybe she was Romanian?) and her little brother and... something else. Oh God. So much random shit. Blarg. Cocou? Cochou? I don't know.

I need food but I feel like I need a shit at the same time. My insides are protesting against something, but I couldn't tell you what. They're like any group of protesters: just making a stink because they can and don't have anything better to do. Hah...

No one has commented on my entries lately. How sad. Maybe I need more friends. Or I need to write something interesting. Or go on some stupid website that isn't as old, outdated, and in the process of slowly dying. I don't know why I care. Funny funny.

I think I've been wearing the same clothes for about 3 or 4 days now and I'm in desperate need of a shower. I suppose if I had had the foresight to bring my laundry with me (I had thought about it briefly), I might have another set of clothes to wear, but I also wasn't planning on staying this long. Oh well. I suppose I should get around to actually calling people and sitting on hold for 20 minutes or more, but I'm still trying to "wake up" or something. Something...

I need to get home. I don't imagine it will be all that special when I get back, but I could be surprised. Or I just want to sit around in my underwear and not have to feel weird about it and so on and so forth. Yup. Business as usual.

The cockatiel keeps screeching at me. It's driving me insane. She'll stop as soon as I look directly at her, but she'll start again after I turn around. I don't think she's ever going to learn the Chocobo Theme either. Oh well.

I guess I should go call people... bleh.

So... I'm here, sitting at my grandparents, trying to amuse myself and so far I haven't done a whole lot. I had intended to use this time to call MTS and get my stupid-ass phone reconnected, but apparently their offices aren't open on the weekend (it's like I didn't already know this...) so there's kind of no point. I'm just sticking around for the promise of leftovers. That's about it. Ho hum.

Yesterday, I went to see The Raid which apparently picked up the subtitle "Redemption" somewhere along the line because of some random trademark issue or some crap. Anyway, it's a really violent and extremely awesome Indonesian movie and I would highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys non-stop action. It was actually really fun to watch in the theatre because I could hear other people exclaiming after something particularly brutal happened or even laughing at some parts. It was pretty amazing.

I don't think I have anything terribly interesting to say, but I never do. NO PROBLEM. Yeah. I should probably try writing something again. Gah. I really need to get better at keeping my momentum up and sticking to something. I don't really see it happening, but I should at least... I don't know... try? Yup...

It's kind of funny and sad how I didn't even really notice until I saw it mentioned in the news section on the homepage, but apparently Writer's Block is no more. Or at least, not something featured on the homepage anymore. Apparently it exists now as a community, but I doubt that many people are going to bother joining it and that'll probably die a slow death as well. It was kind of funny actually reading the post about the fate of Writer's Block. Lots and lots and lots of bitchy comments. Not that I'm surprised or anything, it's just kind of amusing to me. I'm sure people constantly bitch about this website, but I don't generally have to read it, so I don't much care. That's how it goes.

I don't know if this has been a short month or a long month for me, since most of my time has been spent on my ass at home. I really need to write something again, but I just haven't really had the urge or... just haven't really felt like forcing myself to write something. I guess that's how my latest bit of writing actually came to me. Forcing myself into it. I suppose I should try that again.

It's late and I don't really have anything terribly interesting to do, so I should probably just go to bed but I don't want to right now. I imagine that will change soon enough once fatigue sets in properly or I'm just far too fucking bored to be bothered. We will see.

Oh look. My entire entry isn't about Writer's Block. Did you actually think it would be? You're quite silly if you did. Absolutely fucking goofy.

Hey! That's a new option. I just noticed that now. "Do not add to friends pages and RSS." So that's like... adjusting your privacy, but not. 'Cause you could just set it to private if you didn't want them to read it, but instead you're making them come looking for it. That's... interesting.

Ugh. Why am I awake?

I'm awake. I'm alive. I've been staying up later and sleeping in a lot later than I usually do, but with my constant days off, I don't really see much point in sticking to my "regular" schedule. I still haven't tried looking for another job, but I don't know where to start and the idea annoys me. I can just see myself getting fucked over worse somehow. Or ending up with the same amount of shitty hours, right as the hours pick up at my old job or something equally stupid. That and I don't mind my job and what I had wanted to do for a "new job" was something that I might stand a chance of enjoying, but that doesn't seem likely when the primary goal is to find something that gives more hours. Blah. Fuck everything.

The PlayStation Network sent me an email a while back reminding me that I had money sitting in my PSN wallet and encouraging me to go spend it. "Yeah, yeah. Fuckers..." I mumbled as I deleted the email. Somewhere along the line after signing into PSN for no reason and messaging someone that I had recently added (and will probably never play anything with), I noticed that I had a message from someone... but not from anyone on my list. Turns out that I got the same message as my email over PSN. Thanks guys. Since I was bored enough, I actually went to the Store and looked around for something to spend my money on since the money has technically already been spent and it's not like I can ever get the fucking thing back anyway. I found Parasite Eve in the PSOne Classics section, which is something I had seen on Japanese PSN years ago and considered downloading then. I suppose it's good that I waited. I still have 2000 yen on that account just sitting there. I bet if I had given them a legit address they would have harassed me about that too. Heh.

Yup. I don't feel like writing anymore. There isn't much to write about anyway.

Little has improved since my last entry and I'm still having a hard time deciding on what I want to do or what I feel like doing. I messed around in Chaos Breaker again, but there isn't a whole lot for me to do or try. I suppose I could try working on the "basics" section on the wiki or something and maybe try doing the matchups section, but I don't know. I stopped playing DDS after getting slaughtered by a monster in a chest. I don't know why, but I did. Not really important.

I'm pretty sure I have hemorrhoids or something equally lovely going on in my anal region and I'm not entirely sure what to do about it. At this point it's more of a nuisance than any sort of crippling pain, but I don't imagine it will get better. At least, not right away. Or not before I find the whole thing completely unbearable and endure some sort of horrific pain first. Y'know, 'cause it wouldn't be my fucking life if it was simple. Whatever.

I'm tired of complaining. Or maybe I'm just tired. Or I'm bored. Or it doesn't even matter.

Christ. I feel fucking brain-dead. I'm trying to yank some sort of "creativity" out of the shitty goop inside my head, but nothing is coming out. It's all nothing. I'm just tired and feel like going back to bed, which is completely idiotic and I won't actually do it. Fuck...

I'm running out of money and I'll barely be able to afford rent or any of my other expenses this month or the month after. My mom sent my income tax forms in and she says that I should get them back in 3 weeks, but I'm not going to cross my fingers or hold my breath or any of that shit. I won't get as much back as I did last year because I apparently made more money this year, which is kind of a fucking joke to me, but whatever. I need to find a new job, but I probably won't until I decide to do something incredibly fucking stupid because that's how I roll. That's what I did last time, so I don't expect much of anything to change overnight. Nothing ever does. Always the same bullshit with slight variations in-between. Blah blah. My life. Whoop dee fucking doo...

I don't even feel like writing this shit. Fuck. Ugh. Whatever.

It's almost 3 in the morning, my stomach keeps churning like I need to take a gigantic shit, this stupid keyboard sucks (I'm at a friend's place), and I almost feel like writing something, but I wouldn't mind sleeping. Unfortunately, my efforts in doing so have been thwarted thus far by the various gases within my body, my overactive mind, and my lack of overall comfort. Life is truly hard in my world.

I love how the Return/Enter key on this keyboard is fucking massive but the left Shift key is stupidly tiny, as if everyone on the face of the planet has the tiniest and most precise pinky fingers known to fucking man. Shut up, red squigglies. You're not the boss of me. I CONTROL MY OWN DESTINY!

I drove out to Steinbach today to hang out with my handful of friends and I was pleasantly surprised by the gift bag that I got from them. I wasn't really expecting anything since I had had my birthday supper paid for and I'm still kind of in awe over my new computer, but they had decided to get me both Digital Devil Saga games. I think my friends are far too good to me, but I suppose I should learn to accept their generosity for what it is. Or maybe just try to view things in a slightly more positive light. Not likely, but hey, I can pretend like there's actually a chance of me changing for the better at some point or another. As I've said on many occasions, it's fun playing pretend. We also watched SuckerPunch and played some Third Strike before one of them had to leave on account of his testicles going missing, but it was fun while it lasted. I overstayed my welcome as usual, and here I am pecking away at the keyboard when I should be trying to sleep. Heh. It's not like I really have to be anywhere tomorrow anyway since my boss is a fuckface, so whatevs. I really don't care. It'd just be nice if I could actually take a deuce or something...

I think I'm running out of appropriate things to say and I'm not entirely sure I feel like getting into inappropriate things since some people like to bring them up at inopportune times for very strange reasons. Well, that and it's probably just stuff that nobody wants to hear about in the first place, never mind all the other stuff surrounding it. It's fun being painfully vague. I hope it feels like nails slowly being driven into the minds of all who decide to read this. I feast on your pain, pitiful mortals. Mwahahaha.